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Design chiefs set to tartan up tram fleet



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Published Date: 26 November 2008
TOURISTS arriving at Edinburgh Airport could be met by a tartan tram under plans to customise part of the city's fleet.
Council chiefs are considering a range of designs, which would see two trams given a radically different paint job from those in the normal company livery.

The proposals are at a very early stage, but other suggestions have included a gold tram and turning one into a "Santa Express" at Christmas.

Dave Anderson, director of city development, said he hoped that Edinburgh's trams would come to be readily associated with the city in the way red Routemaster buses are with London and yellow taxis with New York, making it important to project the right image.

He said: "Edinburgh is a very elegant city, and we want the trams to be sleek and elegant. They need to have the capacity to surprise and delight people, and we need to think about what we want people's first impression of the city to be. We're thinking about what kind of experience customers can have on arrival at the airport.

"There's an opportunity to do something with the real design talent we have in Edinburgh. We want to see people think so highly of the tram system that they get photographed beside it – that it becomes an icon."

The council has asked a city design consultancy to come up with ideas for what the trams could look like.

Among the designs shown to councillors at a tram committee meeting was one based on a tartan pattern.

But Graham Scott, creative director of Edinburgh-based Nevis Design Consultants, said using tartan would perhaps project the wrong image of the city.

He said: "It depends how it's implemented. If it's treated in a contemporary way it could work, but not if it looks like the sort of tat you get on the Royal Mile.

"They have a real opportunity here to make a statement, and you just wonder if they will. I must say that the designs I have seen so far are a bit disappointing. They have just taken the bus livery and stuck it on the trams"

Earlier this week it was revealed that bosses hope to display a full-scale model of an Edinburgh tram early in the new year, as they bid to win over opponents of the £512 million project.

It is believed that one idea currently under consideration is to create a mock-up of a tram stop, which could go on show in Princes Street Gardens. More than 24,000 people visited a replica of a tram in the Gardens in 2005.


The full article contains 442 words and appears in Edinburgh Evening News newspaper.
Page 1 of 1

  • Last Updated: 26 November 2008 9:47 AM
  • Source: Edinburgh Evening News
  • Location: Edinburgh
  • Related Topics: Edinburgh transport plans
 
1

Skip McClendon,

26/11/2008 11:58:14
Is it April 1st?

Jeez, this tramline joke just gets more and more bizarre.
2

Hexagon Fun,

26/11/2008 11:58:27
I think it looks fine. As long as they get washed frequently. Are there any plans for a tram wash to be situated anywhere ? Maybe i can make one and charge 370 million for it ?
3

allknowing,

26/11/2008 11:58:45
And they could then take them to princes st, and stop right outside the tat-shop next door to dixons!!!!

Welcome to Scotland, home of tat.
4

Hexagon Fun,

26/11/2008 11:58:48
whats up with this skip ?
5

Brian Ferrari,

26/11/2008 11:58:59
Oh good. A story about trams.
6

Dunaskin,

Edinburgh 26/11/2008 12:00:24
Oh no..... I had hoped they'd go for something classic and simple like madder and white. Maybe Gold Bros can sponsor the tartan tat trams?
7

hibbywul,

26/11/2008 12:00:44
There will be plenty Tart(s)in trams at the weekned.
8

Skip McClendon,

26/11/2008 12:03:01
Dave Anderson, director of city development, said he hoped that Edinburgh's trams would come to be readily associated with the city in the way red Routemaster buses are with London and yellow taxis with New York, making it important to project the right image.

"We want to see people think so highly of the tram system that they get photographed beside it – that it becomes an icon."

- Honestly you couldn't make this stuff up. There are lots and lots of yellow taxis in New York. There are lots and lots of Red Buses in London. There will be a SINGLE tramline in Edinburgh. Hardly going to become an iconic representation of the city, is it?

Let's chuck away hundreds of millions of quid, so we can create a speculative photo-op for some tourists. Anything, so we don't have to try to try to continue to justify it as any kind of transport "network", which it clearly isn't.
9

TankEngine,

Uphall 26/11/2008 12:03:40
Do the Council just go out of their way to look for more stupid ways to spend money?
10

Liz,

Edinburgh 26/11/2008 12:04:44
Seriously, someone is having a laugh.

How about just getting the damned things built asap on time, on budget and only then thinking about *rsing around with the cosmetics of them.

Do we really want tourists to arrive to a wave of even more tartan tat?! Will the drivers be wearing kilts and ginger wigs? In fact why not theme them after all the naff Scottish stereotypes, there could be a Brigadoon one then a Trainspotting one why not have a Nessie one whilst they are at it?
11

Tomsk,

26/11/2008 12:05:24
Apparently, "Edinburgh is a very elegant city, and we want the trams to be sleek and elegant. They need to have the capacity to surprise and delight people, and we need to think about what we want people's first impression of the city to be."

So, what do they come up with to reflect the city's elegance, to delight and surprise its visitors, to grab that all important first impression? Tartan!

Lord God Almighty! Gimme strength!

It's beyond satire!
12

fresian,

edinburgh 26/11/2008 12:06:43
I'm sure the YLT will have their own paint scheme in mind if the things ever do start up.
13

Hexagon Fun,

26/11/2008 12:09:17
well . what . would . you . suggest.

perhaps they shoudl have consulted The Edinburgh Miserableati (eg , you lot)
14

,

26/11/2008 12:13:36
Comment Removed By Administrator
Reason:
15

Sister Morag,

Lasswade 26/11/2008 12:18:32
Elegant? Plain tacky more like. The Gold Bros will be sellind models next...
16

roadstohell,

26/11/2008 12:19:05
Oooohh ! whaur kin a get a tin o yon tartan paint ?
a' fancy paintin ma hoose wi it, dae ye think the cooncil wid object ?
17

elayne,

26/11/2008 12:19:19
#14 so do i,some sleek plain black with a wee bit silver would look nice
18

Sister Morag,

Lasswade 26/11/2008 12:19:34
#15 - "sellind": it's like selling only slightly more down-market
19

I love to eat Sellotape,

26/11/2008 12:20:54
Other designs to consider include

- dog's tooth check;
- logos of cigarette manufacturers;
- a pink sparkley one;
- the insides of citrus fruits;
- Lisa Riley;
- a map of Cyprus;
- a shark's tooth check;
- photos of missing swans;
- nostril hairs, as viewed from an electron microscope;
- the logo of Symbionese Liberation Army;
- Ant and Dec, viewed from space;
- a series of worm casts;
- the ears of great trombonists;
- a hamster's tooth check;
- and so on.



20

DAVID,

Edinburgh 26/11/2008 12:21:05
Seeing as how the tram line will go to Leith, can we not paint them in the style of a white Kappa shell suit with accompanying Burberry baseball cap set at a jaunty angle?

Surely more appropriate?

Also, what's this about the trams going to the airport......I thought they weren't quite getting that far?
21

Iain Bhern,

26/11/2008 12:22:06
All they need now is a picture of some shortbread on the side.
22

Peter - very disappointed/concerned,

Edinburgh 26/11/2008 12:23:27
Tartan Trams?

I think I'm going to puke. Mind you, this whole crazy scheme would make you want to spew.

What about employing Sean Connery as a conductor just to help deliver this tartan 'Jockie' image.

23

Ecto,

26/11/2008 12:26:56
What next? This lot truly are on drugs
24

Fifi la Bonbon,

26/11/2008 12:33:18
Some overpaid tube said - "he hoped that Edinburgh's trams would come to be readily associated with the city in the way red Routemaster buses are with London and yellow taxis with New York, making it important to project the right image."

I don't know if anyone living in Edinburgh has noticed but there is already a design scheme for public transport in Edinburgh that is known the world over. Remember - madder red and white?

Instantly recognisable and associated with Edinburgh.

Now mostly gone, because of tubes put in charge of "branding" and "marketing" public transport.
25

roadstohell,

26/11/2008 12:33:32
Stag at bay pictures hung inside,staff wearing comic kilts and wee curly walking sticks, and stop your tickling jock playing over speakers........
I wonder how much the design consultancy fee was ?

This Clowncil is totally devoid of any ideas, in fact it is simply devoid !
26

Dragonlord,

26/11/2008 12:33:52
Quote:
TOURISTS arriving at Edinburgh Airport could be met by a tartan tram under plans to customise part of the city's fleet.

How can they, when the tram LINE doesn't reach the airport? While they are thinking up ideas for colour scemes, why not think up excuses for the LINE not coming in on time and on budget? Time better spent as this white elephant runs away with millions more than they first mentioned.
27

Peter - very disappointed/concerned,

Edinburgh 26/11/2008 12:35:35
"The council has asked a city design consultancy to come up with ideas for what the trams could look like."

So what kind of fancy fee are our Worshipful Town Hall dumplings paying for this service?

"Nevis Design Consultants, said using tartan would perhaps project the wrong image of the city."

Sure, manure colour might be better and would reflect the treatment we citizens have received.


28

Hexagon Fun,

26/11/2008 12:36:55
23 in 200 in Brussels , some bright spark decided to name the underground metro cars after European Cities. So on the front of one you had Berlin , another Sarajevo , another Budapest.

now THATs mental.
29

Cod,

Ann Summers 26/11/2008 12:38:06
There is also a "Rampant Rabbit" designed tram that will leave from outside Ann Summers on Princes Street. Apparently The Beach Boys "Good Vibrations" plays on a loop. I'm looking forward to sitting on the Rampant Rabbit. Hope you are too.

30

Hexagon Fun,

26/11/2008 12:38:20
in 2000 obviously , its not that old.

Peter , cheer up.
31

Hamish Scott,

26/11/2008 12:38:48
Nothing wrong with tartan trams unless you've got a hang-up about our cultural heritage - judging by the posts above a lot obviously do. Might give us a slogan though - Edinburgh, capital of the cultural cringe.
32

Langenburger,

26/11/2008 12:41:50
This is not a debate about the merits of trams but from the diatribes above you'd never know that
Trams soon be a fact of life period.

Tartan trams is a great idea

33

elayne,

26/11/2008 12:42:20
it looks like one of those old 1950s shortbread tins,all they need is a badly done painting of edinburgh castle or the forth bridges
34

Bob 2,

26/11/2008 12:43:03
yip "over budget" and this is what they are spending the TRAM money on.

No doubt costing thousands, could have got some school kids to design it

Yip it sure is April Fools day.!


Hold on as someone comments above this could be a money Spinner.

Take the mock up tram,

paint it up in tartan (using tartan paint of course!)stick in Princes St Gardens (permanently)
Charge the tourists £1 for PHOTOS outside
£5 a shot for sitting in the drivers seats.

Could pay for Line 1b no problems
35

tumshie heid,

26/11/2008 12:46:24
This project gets more absurd by the day! Bicycles to the airport, tartan trams..
Perhaps we could get a stuffed stags head on the front and Ronnie Corbett sitting on a high seat to drive it?
Don't forget the Jimmy Shand medley over the intercom!
36

Robin Bankes,

Culross 26/11/2008 12:48:10
Edinburgh's councillors perhaps need reminding that Edinburgh isn't Glasgow!
The city will be best served in the longer term with a livery of understated elegance.
37

Hexagon Fun,

26/11/2008 12:48:42
Miserable Miserable people full of bevvy and stupid ideas.
38

I love to eat Sellotape,

26/11/2008 12:48:45
Served with tartan soup and a roll with tartan butter. Tartan.
39

GraemeH,

Edinburgh 26/11/2008 12:48:55
Coming on top of yesterday's story about the £70k Airfix tram, todays farce shows that TIE and ECC are utterly incompetent.

Time to stop all works and have a full independent review of this project, its business plan and those tasked with implementing it before we waste hundreds of millions more and saddle Edinburgh with a permanent financial liability.
40

Bob 2,

26/11/2008 12:51:06
And what is wrong with Tartan,

its what the tourists come to see

Could be a lucrative sponsorship thing here from shops

41

AlanW,

Edinburgh 26/11/2008 12:52:55
How tacky is that?
42

Numptie,

Edinburgh 26/11/2008 12:53:12
26# Please try and inform yourself about a subject before you criticize it. The trams will run past the Gogar roundabout depot to the Ingliston park and ride and then on to the airport. See the plan at
http://www.tramtime.com/downloads/detailmaps_nov07/haymarket-airport.pdf
43

Peter - very disappointed/concerned,

Edinburgh 26/11/2008 12:54:21
#31 & #32

No worries, the colour of the trams will be irrelevant as we are quite obviously heading rapidly for a 'virtual' tram scheme.

Can't wait to hear the platitudes and excuses from the Council, Scottish Labour Party et al when this ridiculous scheme gets hammered.

44

eric,

Lothian 26/11/2008 12:57:34
Oh i do like to be beside the seaside.
45

tumshie heid,

26/11/2008 12:57:53
Bob2 If these stupid trams are covered in tartan then how will we see the sponsors logos? Its a ridiculous idea from an agency no doubt given thousands of taxpayers money.
A small child if asked could have come up with the idea of making Scottish trams tartan.
Och aye the noo,will tourists get "a wee dram" when they board the tram?
46

Hexagon Fun,

26/11/2008 12:59:24
44 So do I .

I like to stroll along the prom, prom, prom,
While the brass band plays tiddleyompompom
47

Thomas the Tank,

Edinburgh 26/11/2008 13:01:32
This saga is sounding more like 'Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy' (Vol 4, I think) every day. "The council has asked a city design consultancy . . " - You don't ASK a Design Consultancy to do anything - you throw them a Huge Wad of Public Cash. Memo to 'Dave' Anderson - how about just getting the LINE for the bl00dy things completed, then we can worry what colour we're going to paint them? Or is this just more 'panem et circensis' to distract the public from the brutal truth that the Budget's Burst and the Timetable's galloped over yonder hill?
48

Hexagon Fun,

26/11/2008 13:01:47
45 and Bob.

I know you are a pair of ne'er do wells, but for the sake of argument, and accepting that we will have trams, how would you like to see them designed ? Tell us, then perhaps you can write to the council and tell them instead of giving us all a sore head with your miserable whiney nonsense ? Day after day.
49

roadstohell,

26/11/2008 13:04:55
Why not have the names of "worthy" Clowncillors emblazoned on the side of each trams, a kinda roll of dishonour.

(OBTW please don't malign the name and music of the Blessed Jimmy Shand, he really doesn't deserve it, he was a really nice man, and deserves more respect than he gets)
50

Decent,

26/11/2008 13:09:03
Great - thanks a lot. That's me singing a stupid song for the rest of the day.
51

the good doctor,

tram town 26/11/2008 13:10:25
painting trams should really be left to advertisers. walker's shortbread could do a nice tatty tartan number for instance and generate instead of waste cash.
52

Hamish Scott,

26/11/2008 13:11:01
#24
Yea, we bring back maroon for the buses and use it for the trams as well, that would be a good option.
53

Serious,

26/11/2008 13:11:14
Sheesh, go bust already.
54

Hexagon Fun,

26/11/2008 13:13:53
50 decent , see if you can guess who i am. I give you a clue. Moustache , plmber , erstwhile queen of france.
55

Skip McClendon,

26/11/2008 13:15:16
Remember this story from a couple of months back about how the first tramlines were set to be laid within "weeks":

http://edinburghnews.scotsman.com/topstories/Tram-chiefs-line-up-work.4504283.jp

Willie Gallagher, executive chairman of TIE, said: "Building the track and overhead wires is clearly an important phase for us.

"It will be different from what people have seen so far with the utilities work. The big difference is that people will see something being built and for a lot of people it will be the first time they realise that this thing is actually happening now."

- Hmmmmm, how's that one all going? Given that these tracks on Leith Walk were going to be laid "by January", and given that it's nearly December and there will be no work carried out over Christmas, I imagine that TIE must have almost finished, or at least have made a good start, in laying those tracks by now...

I'm not up that way too often, but I'm sure one of our regular Tram enthusiasts will be happy to update me on just how much track has been laid at this point!
56

Decent,

26/11/2008 13:16:30
Aw naw? Is it you? Really? God I am losing faith in myself.
57

tumshie heid,

26/11/2008 13:17:29
Hexagon heid this is a public forum and I am entitled to my opinion even if it doesn't match your vision of a tartan tram gliding through the city with bicycles piled up in the back and the Bay City Rollers belting out of speakers to encourage tourists to board.
Trams are laughable,tartan trams are even more so.
58

GraemeH,

Edinburgh 26/11/2008 13:17:47
#42 - I think the point is that the proposed tram stop is actually some distance from the airport terminal, being beyond the main car park, across the road from the Hilton. Compared with the bus which stops right outside, it is far from convenient.

This misrepresentation of the airport stop is repeated with many of the stops proposed which are so far away from where existing bus stops and shops offices are as to more than negate any running time savings.

TIE tells lies.
59

Hexagon Fun,

26/11/2008 13:18:17
I look forward to it being finished and for the sake of my own humanity and stress levels i will not comment or care less about the minutae raised by the likes of skip in order to score points over people he doesnt even know.

60

tumshie heid,

26/11/2008 13:18:59
Skip. Hee Haw tracks are laid and thats hopefully the way it will stay.
61

Skip McClendon,

26/11/2008 13:19:42
#59

Yeah, having things lack tracks for a tramline. Minute, insignificant detail indeed!
62

Bob 2,

26/11/2008 13:20:12
48 Hexagon Fun

stick to the original colours, the Liz Hurley design,


instead of giving us all a sore head with your miserable whiney nonsense ? Day after day.. and you read these whiney nonsense...just like everyone else reads the whiney nonsense that everyone writes.
Do we not all have something better to do than comment on the comments on the comments pages.

Yip
63

,

26/11/2008 13:21:19
Comment Removed By Administrator
Reason:
64

Skip McClendon,

26/11/2008 13:21:33
#61

Thing LIKE tracks for a tramline.

That was a typo, before Duncan chimes in again. I know what both like AND lack mean, Duncester!
65

Hexagon Fun,

26/11/2008 13:22:20
61 So they are never going to be in place skip ?
66

,

26/11/2008 13:23:28
Comment Removed By Administrator
Reason:
67

Hmm?,

26/11/2008 13:23:41
I think they should have a picture of some shorty on one side and a Scottie dog on the other ;)
68

Niko Bellic,

26/11/2008 13:27:21
Good move tram chiefs. When older rolling stock is decommissioned, thay can use them as hampers for fatties, filled with shortbread, black bun, Bell's steak pies, and caramel wafers.
69

Robin Bankes,

Culross, waiting on a tram. 26/11/2008 13:30:15
#42 : Numptie - Well said! The psychology driving many of the malcontents and whingers seems to be that if they tell themselves often enough they will see no trams at Edinburgh International Airport then they will see no trams arriving at or departing from Edinburgh International Airport, not even the one that knocks them down! Work is currently progressing on Section 7 which is the section from Gogarburn westwards to the Ingliston P&R and ...er ... Edinburgh International Airport. Ding ding! ;-)
70

Decent,

26/11/2008 13:32:45
Yesterday I was singing the womble song.
71

Robin Bankes,

Culross 26/11/2008 13:34:58
#58 - GraemeH : This misrepresentation of the airport stop is repeated

You will of course have a verifiable link to confirm the 'misrepresentation' you describe?
72

Niko Bellic,

26/11/2008 13:36:08
#70

Are you an anarchist?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/WOMBLES
73

Brian S,

Edinburgh 26/11/2008 13:42:46
I hope to god they're not serious. I cringe at the thought. The Royal Miles is bad enough with all its tartan tat. They need to stear away from the shortbread tin image.
74

Niko Bellic,

26/11/2008 13:46:06
Where will they get the tartan paint from? Sounds a bit far fetched to me.
75

The Judge,

26/11/2008 13:51:13
I predicted this last week, the people in charge of the tramLINE are just filling their boots before the cancellation in January.

After all it's public money, as we all know that stuff grows on trees. Lots of extra wee contracts will be signed before the cut off date.

Dave Anderson is fast becoming one of my favourite council officials.

Edinburgh is an elegant city and a tartan tacky tram is meant to improve that image?

Lay off the drink Dave it's not good for you.

#69 A simple hypothetical question(we're not getting a tramLINE)if the line was finished would I be able to walk out of the terminal building and straight onto a tram like I can with the airport bus at the moment? Or will I have to transport myself, plus luggage to the other side of the airport car park?
76

Salvatori,

26/11/2008 13:51:33
My preference would be for a fluffy tram in the shape of West Highland Terrier (though could smell when wet); a shortbread-shaped tram, or just massive moving version of Smeato's heid.
77

gus1940,

Edinburgh 26/11/2008 13:51:47
And a piper (out of tune of course) on every tram playing that effing awful tune 'Scotland The Brave' over and over again
78

I love to eat Sellotape,

26/11/2008 13:51:56
Brian S, what form of English are you using, man? The "Royal Miles"? "Stear away"?
79

World class concrete,

26/11/2008 13:52:44
So to summarise today's tram story (and someone please tell me this is all a bad joke):

(1) TIE have wasted even more money, this time on a design consultancy to come up with this garbage.

(2) We're effectively being told that everyone who arrives at Edinburgh Airport and gets on a tram is a tourist (rather than a resident or someone coming here on business) and then the story implies tourists are so stupid they'll swallow even more tartan tourist rubbish - as if there isn't enough already in Edinburgh. And whose fake tartan will they use for the livery?

I just despair of the people running this city. Have they nothing better to do than come up with ridiculous notions like this? Have they nothing better to spend OUR money on?
80

Thomas the Tank,

Edinburgh 26/11/2008 13:54:30
#71 - According to the link kindly provided by #42, who appears to be a TramOrak, the map (ok, drawn in crayon on top of a OS plan) shows the Tramstop as being at the furthest point on the perimeter road pentagon from the terminal. That's a TIE Document so it's as 'verifiable' as any other garbage their Lie-factory generates. I concede the indicated location is on BAA land, so it's 'at the airport' but it's a damned sight further and less convenient to drag luggage than the existing bus.
81

Salvatori,

26/11/2008 13:57:55
77- and a wee turban wearing granny making kock-a-leekie soup on a stove at the back of the tram.

(Iknow the spelling is wrong but the mod software wouldn't let me spell it correctly for obvious reasons!)
82

GraemeH,

Edinburgh 26/11/2008 13:58:17
#71. No link needed. Compared with existing bus routes, as an example the Edinburgh business park stop is not convenient for Edinburgh business park, nor is the South Gyle stop or the one for RBS.

Do some reseach; look at where the stops are proposed and compare with where the bus goes, and where the shops, offices, etc are just now. Jeez - the muppets at TIE even have the cheek to say that the stop at Balgreen is handy for the zoo and Saughton for the QMU!
83

Niko Bellic,

26/11/2008 14:00:12
The airport bus isn't all that busy - so no need for a tram, not even a tartan one.

The Standard Life bus could be made into a trolley bus and do a detour - problem solved. But you'd have to sit beside Standard Life staff talking about whatever Standard Life staff talk about - pensions, mesmerism, Clacton Polytechnic, digital cameras, werewolves, laminate flooring.
84

,

26/11/2008 14:00:56
Comment Removed By Administrator
Reason:
85

The Hide and Seek Champion,

26/11/2008 14:02:17
Forget the Tartan. Elephant White will be much more appropriate.
86

Niko Bellic,

26/11/2008 14:05:25

How about not bothering with trams since nobody wants them.
87

Peter - very disappointed/concerned,

Edinburgh 26/11/2008 14:12:38
#80 Thomas,

" I concede the indicated location is on BAA land, so it's 'at the airport' but it's a damned sight further and less convenient to drag luggage than the existing bus."

Don't worry Thomas, the airport will provide tartan-clad 'coolies' to carry visitors luggage to the waiting trams (if they are ever completed).

An interesting scenario might be the arrival of Mr & Mrs Elmer Phudd from the USA, can't you just hear her:-

"Say Elmer why don't we adopt one of these quaint little old tartan Scattish trams?" (shades of the cabbage patch dolls!!).

88

Niko Bellic,

26/11/2008 14:21:10
So much for the exterior.

Inside the tram there will be a 50" monitor showing Norman Wisdom films.
89

Niko Bellic,

26/11/2008 14:22:16
#87

I'm very disappointed/ concerned at your lazy stereotyping of Americans.

Jeezo.
90

Johnny Yen,

26/11/2008 14:22:30
trying to polish a túrd?
91

Niko Bellic,

26/11/2008 14:24:21
http://www.spiegel.de/international/zeitgeist/0,1518,586966,00.html
92

Peter - very disappointed/concerned,

Edinburgh 26/11/2008 14:27:37
#89 Niko,

They have set a precident and had it coming.

93

Niko Bellic,

26/11/2008 14:31:48
#92

No, trams weren't invented by the USA.

In fact, trams are loosely synonymous with socialism. Easten Europe is more tramified than anywhere else in the world.

Capitalism v2.0 was rubbish.
94

I love to eat Sellotape,

26/11/2008 14:32:34
THE TARTAN TRAM CALYPSO
We all goin' to travel on de Tartan Tram
De council assure us dat it ain't no scam
With it costin' zillions, I see trouble ahead
so I think it would be better if dey painted dem red
95

roadstohell,

26/11/2008 14:32:51
#91 so, here we would have wee Morningside ladies intoning,
" come away in, you'll have had your tea" !
96

Niko Bellic,

26/11/2008 14:33:15
Capitalism 3.0 will be like the ipod style of capitalism - a bit scratchy but cheaper than getting ripped off £12.99 for cd's.
97

roadstohell,

26/11/2008 14:33:48
#90 lay off the Polish, you cannae blame them for these tartan trams
98

Niko Bellic,

26/11/2008 14:35:54

scotlan Iz A byatch

Wen mi fus come ti Embra town
Mi was jus drivin tramz aroun

But drivin trams aroun
Iz a monotonous job I foun

Dem seh it gon be netwuk
But dem only buil' one line

disya tramline is a byactch
99

Niko Bellic,

26/11/2008 14:38:07

Tell mi sumting
Mista Clownsil man
Where yi got yi moni fi?

Yi got it fi di workin claas
An yi spen it on a tram, yi raas!
100

Peter - very disappointed/concerned,

Edinburgh 26/11/2008 14:43:25
#93 Niko,

I'm well aware that trams were not invented in the USA and I'm sure that the "Good Ol' US" wouldn't associate itself with anything from Eastern Europe (nor indeed Western Europe) if they have any sense.

101

Niko Bellic,

26/11/2008 14:44:41

#100

Fine. I have NO IDEA WHAT YOU'RE ON ABOUT. But that's okay. SPRAFF ON LIKESAY.
102

I love to eat Sellotape,

26/11/2008 14:49:08
Trams were actually invented by the Scottish engineer, Sir Angus McTram, in 1845. There's a statue of him in Falkirk.
103

Peter - very disappointed/concerned,

Edinburgh 26/11/2008 14:52:08
#101 Niko,

I was merely responding to your comment at #93, but perhaps you've forgotten (probably goes with your Eastern European sounding title).

104

Niko Bellic,

26/11/2008 14:57:14
#103

I don't know what your point was about americans.

I don't know what a 'precident' is, or even if you meant 'precedent' your comment is still nonsensical at best, otherwise hopelessly vague.

I don't know what you're on about regarding the US and its attitude to Eastern Europe (bearing in mind that literally millions of its citizens are of eastern European extraction)

And you accuse ME of being somehow incoherent.

*Sheesh*

Peter - do me a favour and just leave the thread.
105

Niko Bellic,

26/11/2008 14:59:35

#102

That's hurdy gurdy bampot lies. Angus McTram was from Lenzie, not Falkirk.

You're thinking of Angus Johnson of Johnson press who was more Falkirkular than Falkirk itself.
106

Peter - very disappointed/concerned,

Edinburgh 26/11/2008 15:09:51
#104 Nik,

"you accuse ME of being somehow incoherent."

You left out "totally rambling" from your post. By the way, thanks for pointing out the typo.

For Eastern Europeans, please read 'Commies' a great and well known favourite with the US.

107

Niko Bellic,

26/11/2008 15:13:05
#106

You are a dafty. Belt up.
108

alex patersons English teacher,

26/11/2008 15:15:17
92.

precident bush?

go and barrack obama if you need to shout at someone.
109

Niko Bellic,

26/11/2008 15:18:53
dippit dafty ding ding dribble
110

Niko Bellic,

26/11/2008 15:19:40
ALL YOUR BASE ARE BELONG TO US, TRAM CHIEF
111

I love to eat Sellotape,

26/11/2008 15:20:48
105.

Apologies. I was thinking about Kevin McAllister, not Sir Angus. I'm sure you'd agree he is as Falkirkular as the Falkirkular Gyratory System. Or is that the Falkirkular Respiratory System, I don't know.
112

Niko Bellic,

26/11/2008 15:22:40
I'd rather be from Falkirk than Lenzie

If I could, I surely would.

East Dunbartonshire makes me want to smock crack
113

Niko Bellic,

26/11/2008 15:30:33
Other tram designs:

Henri Fantin-Latour's "A Basket of Roses"

A pig with a strawberry balanced on its nose.

The upper torso, head and neck of a diving suit kissing a girl.

A picture of a woman wearing a dress made out of bacon rashers that have been wrapped in clingfilm.

The famous CP1919 Pulsar 100 pulse graph.

A Rolls-Royce in a swimming pool with a clock above it.

An advert for Vimto.
114

Decent,

26/11/2008 15:31:10
Niko????