John Gibson: Will we ever see a string of pearls?

SO is Princes Street ever going to resemble "a string of pearls" (God knows when), as envisaged by our city council? Their master plan to demolish two B-listed buildings and erect in their place a fancy hotel and a department store has been stymied.

Edinburgh World Heritage and the Cockburn Association are objecting and they've got enough clout to put the entire concept on the back burner until . . . well, until Hibernian win the Scottish Cup.

Meantime, what continues to bug me on Princes Street is the scaffolded appalling slum rotting before our very eyes and the eyes of every tourist where Romanes & Paterson existed before the spectacular fire on August 3 last year.

August 2007? That's only 15 months ago! Give our live-wire city councillors a break!

But "string of pearls" does strike a resonant note with me. Didn't Jimmy Stewart name a tune after the string of pearls he gifted to June Allyson in The Glenn Miller Story?

Speaker's horse
Class-conscious Pauline my-father-was-a-bricklayer Prescott, wife of the classic oaf, wonders: "How do you tell a lord his zip's down?" That's a snippet from the watchable TV documentary on Prezza and his missus.

What connoisseurs of rough politics would love to see now is a similar warts-and-all insight into an established real fly man, the Clydeside's Speaker of the House, Michael Martin. Like Prezza, his accent is a dead giveaway.

Disaffectionately known as Gorbals Mick, the acknowledged dab hand with MPs' "allowances", doubtless he would run a mile from the cameras.

Is there any Parly person harbouring more hang-ups when it comes to class distinction?

Looks a bit of a pillock dolled up in those fancy Speaker's ceremonial togs, but he'd be a scream as a panto horse. Back end, of course. Can't we sneak him into the King's?


Afterwords . .
. . Class act Michael Winner about John Cleese's third wife Alyce Faye Eichelberger, saying her voice could "tear the testicles out of a rabbit". Same applies to Anne Robinson, BBC defence correspondent Caroline Wyatt and, when she read the news, Moira Stewart.